Which is the best way to tell a person with whom you are driving that he is driving too fast?
- "I feel quite uncomfortable at this speed." ✓
- "You are well over the speed limit."
- "Didn't you see the speed limit sign back there?"
- "Why do you always have to drive so fast?"
Answer: A. "I feel quite uncomfortable at this speed."
The best approach is to speak about your own reaction, as in "I feel quite uncomfortable at this speed."
Why this is the answer
The handbook's advice for handling an unsafe driving situation includes using "I" statements to get across how you feel, and it gives the example of saying you feel nervous and asking the driver to slow down for you. Saying you feel uncomfortable at this speed follows that pattern: it puts the focus on your own reaction rather than on the driver's fault, which is what the handbook recommends when you want someone to stop driving unsafely.
Why the other answers are wrong
- B. "You are well over the speed limit." — "You are well over the speed limit" is a statement about the driver's fault rather than an "I" statement about how you feel, which is the approach the handbook suggests.
- C. "Didn't you see the speed limit sign back there?" — "Didn't you see the speed limit sign back there?" is a blaming question aimed at the driver, not an "I" statement about your own feelings.
- D. "Why do you always have to drive so fast?" — "Why do you always have to drive so fast?" challenges and criticizes the driver instead of expressing your own reaction the way the handbook recommends.
Remember it
When someone's driving scares you, talk about yourself: "I feel..." and then ask for the change you want.